I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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