It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Randomize
