Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
