You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize