nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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