I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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