I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
