can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
