I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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