new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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