We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
