I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
