You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I am one with the molecules
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize