When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize