your thong is hanging out like whoa
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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