"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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