She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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