If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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