found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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