I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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