Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
