ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
