hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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