i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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