Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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