Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
