Tell her she can't have a vagina
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
