If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
