I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Someone signed my nipple.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
