My first STD was from a foam party
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
