Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
