He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
