I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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