I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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