Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
is it fun? or sober?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
