I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
