The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
