We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
