You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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