YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
