No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
