You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
