The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Randomize
