if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
