I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
home. puking in laundry basket.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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