who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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