The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I currently don't understand fingers.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
