the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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