Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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