Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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