I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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